Borowitz Report

World Leaders Receive Crank Calls from Someone Claiming to Be President of United States

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a spate of annoying telephone pranks that has lasted nearly two weeks, heads of state from around the world have been receiving crank calls from someone claiming to be the President of the United States, the United Nations reported on Thursday.

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Trump Urges Spy Agencies to Lay Off Russia and Focus on Threat Posed by Actresses

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—In an emergency meeting at Trump Tower on Monday morning, President-elect Donald J. Trump urged the heads of the nation’s intelligence agencies to “stop picking on Russia” and instead focus on “the very real threat” posed by Hollywood actresses.

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